


Why did this happen to me?

by Bobbie_bear



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: Angst, Character Death, Heavy Angst, I'm Sorry, I'm shit at writing, It's 3 am kill me, Sad, first fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-15
Updated: 2017-08-15
Packaged: 2018-12-15 15:41:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 477
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11809038
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bobbie_bear/pseuds/Bobbie_bear
Summary: It shouldn't have ended like this. It shouldn't have even started.((Michael talking about losing Jeremy and it's really sad but this is my first fanfiction soooyeah please read it I'll try to be good





	Why did this happen to me?

It shouldn't have ended liked this. It never should have even started.

 

You're just a freak no one could ever love.

Just a loser.  
At a party.  
In the bathroom.  
Crying.  
Jesus fuck your pathetic.  
-  
-  
-  
Here's how this stupid mess all started.

Jeremy Heere.

Boy does this name hurt to think about.

He and I had been best friends for years, 12 years to be exact. Jeremy was your basic highschool boy obsessed with the highschool social hierarchy.

But he was a loser like me. That was fine. We were a team and we were going to be a team forever. 

We stuck with each other through everything. Through each of our awkward emo phases, beginning of puberty with voice cracks and acne galore, even being little kids and pushing each other into the mud.

We always had fun. Always telling jokes, getting high, eating our weight in food everyday, and playing video games.

I thought we were cool.

Our own kind of cool.

A special thing only me and Jeremy could have.

But he wanted more.

I was never enough.

I'll never be enough.

See it sucks crushing on someone who I know better than myself and him being obsessed with a GIRL that I could never be.

 

I wasn't beautiful.

No one could talk for hours about me.

I wasn't talented like her.

I couldn't dance or sing without tripping up.

From my stupid clumsiness or anxiety overloading my senses.

This was all Christine.

The beautiful, talented, girl that I was not.

The girl Jeremy would always talk about.

He talked about how he wasn't cool enough.

He talked about how she was a God's gift for him and only him if he could be cool.

He told me about this very sketchy "pill".

He said it would make him cool.

He said he could finally be happy.

I was never enough.

I couldn't help him.

He spent all his saved up money for a "squip" or whatever the hell it was called.

Nothing happened.

I told him not to waste his money (and mine) .

He wouldn't listen.

He HAD to be popular.

I decide to leave him be since he sees Christine and I can't deal to see him happy with someone else.

I wait for him to call me.

Text me.

Fucking email me.

Nothing.

Absolutely nothing.

He won't talk to me in the hallways.

He won't answer my messages.

Did I do something wrong?  
Did he finally realise he hates me?  
Did the computer pill fuck work?

All these questions answers are yes 

But I didn't know that untill after it was too late.

He started hanging with the cool kids, started dressing funny, started being confident.

It was like watching a TV macho version of Jeremy. 

From afar.

I could never get close to him.

This had to be the end.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey sorry this is terrible I've always wanted to write a fanfic so here's me trying and failing terribly. I'm not sure how I'll end this but I add new parts every once in a while or when I figure out what to write. Sooo yeah please tell me what you think!!


End file.
